The Happiness Project : Super Late Book Review

So why is this super late? Personally because I bought this book a year ago and I’ve just finished this book 2 days ago lol. Blame anyone but me! *dances*

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(credit goes to Gretchen Rubin)

I bought The Happiness Project because of her epiphany in the bus. And it makes me curious, what kind of things she did in a year to achieve happiness? Like its review, it made me smile and think at the same page🙂

I made the compilation of sentences/words/quotes that I like. Probably not every sentences, mostly the sentences that lingered in my head.

Don’t expect praise or appreciation.

Tell me it’s not a hard thing to do. Everyone likes to be praised. I believe it becomes from our childhood because parents always praise their children. Somehow praise = award. Maybe that’s why when you did your best but you got no praise in the end, you didn’t feel happy. I’m still working on this part, to just do my best without hoping for a praise from anyone.

Enjoy the fun of failure.

Like what she wrote on her book, “When I thought about why I was sometimes reluctant to push myself, I realized that it was because I was afraid of failure—but in order to have more success, I needed to be willing to accept more failure”. Will to accept failure! Failure sucks, but we learn something from failure. Another homework to do for sure.

Arrival fallacy, the belief that when you arrive at a certain destination, you’ll be happy.

Described by Tal Ben-Shahar in his book Happier. Also quoted from her book, “The arrival fallacy is a fallacy because, though you may anticipate great happiness in arrival, arriving rarely makes you happy as you anticipate”. That is so true! Anticipation can make you sleep less for a long time and when you get that thing that makes you excited, the feeling is flat again. Maybe that’s the reason many people say that the “getting know each other” phase is far more exciting than the “lover” phase? lol. While we’re talking about this matter, somehow I think when we like someone, we just can’t stop imagining the idea of being together with that certain person. We’re creating imagination of how this person would be if s/he was your lover. That’s what drives people crazy. *look at self*

I’d love to write everything down but her monthly resolutions are the important part. I like her resolutions! Here are some of her resolutions that I’ll try to do myself :

  1. Exercise better
  2. Act more energetic
  3. Don’t expect praise or appreciation
  4. Fight right
  5. Enjoy the fun of failure
  6. Enjoy now
  7. Acknowledge the reality of people’s feeling
  8. Take time for projects
  9. Find more fun
  10. Take time to be silly
  11. Start a collection (MTN and all those cute stationery)
  12. Remember birthdays
  13. Show up
  14. Make three new friends
  15. Spend out (love this idea the most. We tend to save the thing we loves for the best moment and ended up not using it, expired or broken maybe, which is a pity)
  16. Give something up
  17. Indulge in a modest splurge
  18. Keep a gratitude notebook (I like how she struggled with keeping a gratitude notebook because in the end, it did feel like an obligation. She’s still a human.)
  19. Forget about results
  20. Make time
  21. Stimulate the mind in new ways
  22. Give positive reviews
  23. Find an area of refuge

So far I start a collection, I purchased my very first Midori Traveller’s Notebook! First time I knew about this notebook was a many years ago, 8 years probably. At that time I was a university student and didn’t have a paypal account, so the idea of having MTN was sadly impossible. Then about 2 months ago I saw a lot of MTN pictures on my instagram feed and the unstoppable feeling of having one was killing me. I started my research to find a best store to purchase one since I live in Indonesia and you couldn’t find MTN in any book store. After I ordered mine, I found different online store who sells it slightly cheaper. So I’d recommend this website if you want to buy one. The happy feeling when the notebook arrived was heart-warming. Not everyone understands the reason why I want to spend fortune for a notebook but it doesn’t matter, like Gretchen said, “Be Nurul”.

I would recommend this book to anyone who’s searching for the concept of happiness. We tend to think that materials bring happiness, but it’s happiness inside that really matters. I like the way she’s telling her story because it’s not sugar coated. If she did something that bothers her, she would stop doing it, even though it’s related with the way she’s finding her happiness. You can see my opinion in the gratitude notebook. She (probably) stopped doing it and being thankful in everything she did instead, not forcing herself to keep doing it to just stick to that resolution. That’s why I said that’s human.

Thank you for reading this book review. Excuse grammatical error like always hahaha

What is mirror?

Hey ya guys!

You all are familiar with Justin Timbelake’s song Mirror right? In my opinion, that song is so beautiful and romantic. Not only that, he also dedicated the song for his grandparents, ain’t that sweet?

My friend and I ever talked about mirror in relationship, like, how do you define mirror in relationship? We came to many conclusions but not sure which one was the best lol

So let’s think about mirror theory in relationship. We see ourselves when we’re facing a mirror and doing the same thing like we do. If we raise our hand, we see our reflection does the same thing. Is that a good mirror factor in relationship? Do you prefer your loved ones to be the same like you? And we’re talking about many aspects, could be interest, could be habits, could be sports, could be anything. It would be fun to have one, wouldn’t it?

Another mirror theory is, when we’re facing a mirror and our reflection does the same thing, our reflection does it slightly different, like left and right different. Why were we talking about this mirror theory? You see, usually there are two types of answers for what kind of dream husband/wife that you’re looking forward in future. They are “have some similarities” or “totally different from me”.

My friend added one more theory but I kinda forgot what her theory was xD

Love is a strange thing, doesn’t it? You want a perfect lover, then you try to find someone who has many similarities with you, especially characters. Funny how usually it ends. Both of us are hard headed, too many similarities makes me bored, etc. You think similarities can make things easier but it also makes everything difficult. You want someone that is totally different with you because you think it’s gonna be perfect, you complete each other. Usually it ends with one party fed up with other party, tired from tolerating all the differences they have.

Can you see the mirror that I’m trying to portray here?

I’ve wanted to write this post since a long time ago but got distracted a lot, like always lol. Even until now, I’m still trying to figure out what kind of mirror that suits me best. Good luck in finding yours~🙂

Update :

My lovely-lazy-ass friend told me about her idea on path (called her like that because she didn’t want to add her theory in comment :p). Her theory is that the other person reflects you, what you are doing whether it’s right or wrong. The other person acts as a mirror to point out to you your best and worse features. So in a way, this person is a reminder for you to always do better and to always be grateful and accept who you really are.

I found her theory is one hell of combination😀

The Secret Language

No, it’s not about how I secretly pass message to any of my friend if want to talk about something inappropriate not important in daily life lol

The Secret Language is a website where you can read about your personality or in Indonesian, it’s like a Primbon thing. What unique about this website is, all the knowledge are based on research from people who were born on the same birth date. That’s what my friend Wibi said about this website, or as I quoted from the website, “Secret Language scientific personality reports have proven to be over 90% accurate after 21 years in use by millions of people in a dozen languages worldwide. Our data comes from Gary Goldschneider’s 40-year empirical study of the life stories of more than 20,000 people, analyzed by date of birth“.

If you want to know more about Gary Goldschneider, feel free to use Google awesomeness in finding out about people you don’t know😉

Oh and if you want to try this website, make sure you choose the day field to find out about your personality, because other options (48 and match) are more to relationship thingy

I’ve tried this website twice because I didn’t really read everything for the first time. I should say that most of the part are quite true, and I can’t help but wonder that there’s another people who born on January 26th in 1989 out there who feels the same way like me. I’m not the only alien in this world! xD

Traits for people who born at this date are active, dramatic, confident, destructive, dictatorial, driven, precocious, unique, self-taught, reckless, distracted, stressed-out, devoted, practical, spiritual, rigid, insecure, self-sacrificing. Aaaand yes, most of them (or almost of them) are true, ladies and gentleman. Even destructive part.

More I read about the traits, more I feel like it fits me somehow. I already restrain the urge to copy everything from there to here lol.

This part is true :

On the negative side, they have a tendency toward self-destructiveness. They are more hurtful to themselves than to others. They can be emotionally unstable, and at times can appear distracted, wired, self-absorbed, and can be easily upset. Their sensitivity to external stimuli may be pronounced in such moods, and they may have an acute need to withdraw to a quiet place, away from the bustle of the world. Easily stressed out, even prone to periodic breakdowns, they must learn to toughen themselves. If they can become less easily aroused, they will deal more effectively with the exigencies of everyday life.

Some people knows about this, about the tendency toward self-destructiveness. It’s all happening in my mind. I don’t realize it until I shared what I thought with some people and they told me that I’m over-thinking stuff. Periodic breakdowns, experienced it for quite a while I think, since last year. Not gonna talk about it hahaha.

This is also true :

In matters of love, they insist that their mates understand their need for freedom.

Heeell yeaaah I know I’m not making this up! We live for freedom! xD If we are willing to be tamed, it means you mean a lot to us, do bear that in mind.😉

This one also :

Their giving and sacrificing side can, however, be their downfall. Too often they push themselves too hard in trying to serve their fellows or allow others to drain them of energy or otherwise take advantage of them.

Self-sacrificing at its best. Enough said.

This one too :

The Month of the Visionary is the eleventh month of the Personology year, and is universal in orientation. Those born this month symbolize advanced thought, which takes us out of our physical state and allows us to view the infinite in all things. These people also represents acceptance of all points of view, and shows the universal wisdom inherent in thoughts and actions.

Acceptance of all points of view. It’s crucial in everyday’s life, because there’s always two sides of story in every story.

And yeah this one too :

Since striking forth boldly characterizes so much of what they do, January 26 people must beware of hurting others, either psychologically or physically. Because they tend to act quickly and decisively they can take others by surprise. Consequently, loved ones may not feel comfortable or stable in their presence. Unless they make their intentions and expectations more apparent, friends and mates may find it difficult to be close or intimate with them.

Yeees I tend to act spontaneously and for that, I don’t feel sorry actually, but if I ever hurt anybody in process, I’m truly sorry. I didn’t mean that😦

You’ll know for sure if I don’t like you (in terms you did something that purposely to hurt me, not accidentally), believe me *evil grin*

I still have sooo many things to copy paste here but then where’s the fun in reading everybody’s else personality? Go find yours!

Catch you later! xD

2015?

Hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii oh my it’s been a very long time since the last time I wrote something in hereeee, dusts are everywhere *blows*

and it’s 2015 already, another year has passed, wow, time really went by so fast, eh?

Soo, when was I last time? Still telling story about 2013, if I’m not mistaken?

Well, many things happened in 2014 too for sure, like, I have a job! Finally! lol xD

and yes, continuing my last year’s “first time” moment, I had done a lot of “first time” things to on 2014, bad and good things for sure

I’m not even sure what will I write now actually, but I just had this urge to write something again since months ago, so

here we are! It’s a good start, isn’t it? at least I wrote something hahaha

Probably gonna write something later again, maybe books review? but I’m not really sure that my taste will be the same like everybody else’s taste

Well, gonna write anyway xD

See you later!

12th Month of 2013, Hello 2014!

Finallyyyy, we come to the last 3 months of 2013! *drumrolls* Looking back now, I’ve done a lot of things at 2013.

October.

Dad bought a car! Surprised me, even. Named it Archie🙂

Will have a debut with NYE lol just a backdancer though, Goddess’s one, so damn hard but entertaining xD

Finally our apartment unit is ready! The developer promised us it would be finished around february but hello october -___- I believe if dad and mom didn’t go to the unit everyday and almost literally watching all the workers finish everything, the apartment probably finish 1 month later xD A little sad though, means I have to move here and leave my cozy kosan. Well I practically just use the room for sleeping only lately lol, almost 12 hours outside. I spent the first day at apartment together with whole family😀

Turned out my apartment changed into base camp fir several people lol xD I didn’t mind actually, the more the merrier!

aaaand, annnd in this month, I watched another Super Show, at Manila again!!! I felt bad to my parents at first actually, because i still have no job, mostly I’m having fun all the time, and now I’m going to manila again otl. Said it will be my last time doing it, because I’m hoping I already have a job next year and it will be hard for me to ask for a day off and watching a concert. So, Manila here I come again! and the concert was awesoooome, and it’s the first time I bought a standing ticket for watching a korean concert, i was tiiiired, but close to the stage xD

Went to ITB’s job fair for the first time lol just wandering around though, only submitted to 2 companies

Halloween’s day! Will celebrate it for first time in my apartment! Was jokingly planning it with alan and arya before, but we decided to really make it xD We even bought pumpkin and everything, we even dressed up and did scary make up! not so many people joined, but it was fun😀

hey, i couldn’t say that particular word! thought i could really say it, i said it easily in my mind. but who knows it could be that hard when it comes to spill

November.

I moved to apartment permanently now, the process of moving out my things actually not really that complicated, because I did all almost by myself lol xD with one suitcase, 2 cabinets every night, it saves me lot of time hahaha, besides i don’t really want to move all my things. Finish in one week! xD so starting this month, stays everyday at apartment😀 Not really need much time to feel alone though, because my friends practically made my apartment as their base camp hahaha

MahanaBiz is officially started, i’m in charge in marketing. This is new side project of Mahana Live, so I’m quite excited actually😀

3 of my friends almost got into accident >_<

December.

We arrived at the last month of the year!!

First job interview! Applied to Gistex at Cimahi from university’s website and got called for psychology test, sister drove me there and went straight to pick up mom at Bandung airport. The duration of the test was like around 3 hours maaan, tired of counting the numbers thing lol. Sister and mom picked me up again after that, and we went to have massage lol

In this month I was also having a quite big fight with sister. It’s like pouring everything that we’ve always been hiding so far to each other. Hurts actually.

KCDC event, gonna perform with Queen A at that event. Probably the last stage I will ever dance :’)

and on this month, actually I cried quite a lot. It feels like crying for all the things that’s been bugging me this year hahaha, always been like this since last year too, I don’t know why.

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And….

IT’S NEW YEAR, 2014!!

Having new year party at my apartment, not many people though, but it’s still fun! We made dinner and play games until dawn lol, what a fun things to do to start a new year xD

New year resolution? I have none actually. Rather than listing what I want to this year and found out that I’ll do none of them at the end of 2014 later, I prefer to be surprised at myself. What I do want is change, from everything.

After I wrote everything that I’ve done at 2013, I notice I did a lot of “first time” hahaha, which is good! I hope I’ll make many first time again on 2014🙂

So folks, enjoy 2014! ^^

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

9th Month of 2013

2014 is heeeere, yet here I am, still telling the 2013 story otl >_<
can’t wait to tell the 2014 one

well then, 3rd part of 2013 year! Let’s start the story!

July.

Starting this month with a memorable thing? HAHAHAHA where the hell i got this gut from, but no regret xD

Kinda feel lonely actually because my sister was going to Korea for her summer school, never felt this way before actually, strange

Septi eonni was back to koreaaa😦 So I accompanied her to Cipaganti BTC, even to Soekarno Hatta Airport. She introduced me to her friend Uyeong, she’s cute but her indonesian is not really good. She’s also majoring in Indonesian at UPI like Septi eonni. My korean teacher’s wife cooked us tteokpokki and pumpkin soup. They’re delicious! When the time to say goodbye came, neither me nor Septi eonni was crying loooool xD Another friend of Septi eonni took me back to San Pacific hotel because my parents were there so we both will go to Bandung together tomorrow morning. We’re facetiming with sister hahaha

I found out I slightly have silindris D:

This month was the fasting month! Basically almost spent half of the month at Bandung before going back to Dumai

This month also a graduation day for my friend Qicho at ITB😀

This month was also a sad month, because Cory Monteith, the Glee actor, found dead in his motel room😦 He and Lea Michelle were supposed to have their wedding in 2 weeks, so heart breaking for Gleeks😦

First time driving manual car in Bandung hahaha, my friend’s car xD Brave enough because the road was empty around dawn lols

Sister’s 21th birthdaaaaay! and she’s celebrating it at koreaaaaa xD last night when we’re skype-ing I told her roommate to at least give her cake and maybe a little party if she could, she said already planned it but idk the story hahaha. Bet it will be her favorite birthday memories🙂

In this month mom also gave me her first diamond ring that she bought, even before I was born. It has the same age as me :’D

Sister made mistake about her ticket for going home lol, she mistakenly inputted the wrong month. It’s supposed to be July but she inputted June lmaoooo, parents went nuts. Thank God she still could buy a plane ticket, much expensive for sure.

 

August.

Sister went back to Indonesiaa, and had another crisis orz. She missed the plane to go to Pekan Baru, like seriouslyyyy. Another parents went nuts lol. Thank God again, she could buy another ticket, kinda complicated though

So actually, I bought a TOEFL book before at Bandung, so i can use them as excuse when I’m not doing anything at home lololol BUT I really finish them all!! So proud of this achievement! xD

Had plenty fasting break gathering hahaha with elementary school friends mostly

Have this new routine on this fasting month, phone calling with Pipit loool our fasting could not be really get accepted this year kakanya HAHAHA

and, HAPPY IED MUBARAK EVERYONE ^^ and for this year, the big day fell in my dad’s birthday! we had a little celebration with nasi tumpeng🙂

At second day of Ied Mubarak day we went to pekan Baru, having a little runaway, mom said. Well it’s a family little holiday basically, because we’re practically almost doing nothing, lazy-ing on bed xD We picked up our helper Kak Ema! she was like, my favorite helper ever. She’s my first helper, even before I was born until my junior high school. She wants to work with my family agaaaaiiinnn😀

Went back to Bandung, Kak ema was having a hard time letting me and my sister go to Bandung :’)

 

September.

Homey Korean Language Club Bandung open recruitment! Didn’t go to sleep at all the night before, was having a great conversation with bunch of my friends until dawn lmao 32 hours awakeee

Continuing on giving driving lesson to friends, on my university area xD

Sister got into a minor accident on her way to do college stuff at some village, but she’s fine >_< kinda mad and sad though because we had this little argument before she went, and she didn’t answer her phone or text me back when I was asking about the accident

Played DDR at King’s timezone! oh God I can’t believe it hahaha i miss DDR so much.

 

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So yeah, that’s what happened from July to September! Mostly fun stuffs, not everything’s fun though, just mostly xD

 

6th Month of 2013

This is actually a continuous post of 3rd Month of 2013.  I wrote the first one per 3 months, so I’ll keep writing this in that way. I know this is near year end already lol, mainly that’s why I start writing this post again, to have a proper closure for 2013 and at least, I finish what I started🙂

So, let’s recall!

April.

April has been an important month for this year, it’s my graduation month😀. It took me a long time to finally celebrate this one day. My Grandmother attended, also my cousin Laras. My family of course also came, but my sister couldn’t make it due to her examination day in another city😦 most of my friend came, also my korean friend Septi eonni hehe surprised she could make it xD It was almost a perfect day if I might say. On this month I also prepared my korean visa with my friend, it will be my second visit to Korea, so excited! (and yes I still owe the rest of the story on this blog otl). And also on this month, I had my first job interview. Not really official interview though but still, an interview. And for the first time on my life, I got a video message for my graduation! xD My 4 friends who couldn’t make it to my graduation day decided to make a video message for me. I’m so touched, really, because I think I’m no one to them, I’m not even an important person to them :’) I really want to upload the video on youtube but I’m not sure one of them is gonna like it lmao. Also have a Dufan vacation with my korean class friends (they’re Indonesian), it’s been a long time since we went out and play together xD.

Come to think of it, I also got fooled at this April mop -_____-

May.

The second journey beguuuun, journey to Korea! I went with my friends this time, which is more fun than before of course, and longer! 10 days for this journey, and I should say, such an amazing one😀 My friend and I even could watch Running Man filming at Sogang University xD more story on this journey later😉

On this month I also did something that I believe I didn’t do since almost, 7-8 years ago? Who knows I still need courage to do it again haha, it’s a hard thing to do. But I’m glad I did. And I’m glad that so far, things changed, but we’re still together despite everything. or maybe I’m the only one who think that way?🙂

Mom’s birthday also on this month. We fought a lot, but I love you Mom.

Bought a pair of boots for the first time of my life hahaha.

Oh also first time coming to cosplay event, I believe? Because this event held in my college so I could go xD someone asked a picture together with me which I found it strange since I didn’t do any cosplay at all lol

June.

This month was also a remarkable one. I lost my Ipad at Balai Kartini Jakarta while working on Richard Clayderman concert😦 Couldn’t do anything about it since I had jobs to do, but at least I’ve tried my best to find it. Glad the concert went well though🙂

Helped sister with her visa to Korea, she got accepted to Sogang University’s summer program. So happy for her but also envy at the same time lol, since I always wanted to join a summer program but since I found about it when I almost graduated, I couldn’t register.

Went to Tangkuban Perahu with Septi Eonni. It’s been a long time since I went there, glad I could fulfill one of my promises to Septi Eonni. She will go back to Korea next month😦

Also celebrated Mom’s birthday in this month hahaha, or like someone said, always one month late xD

Another journey on this month, went to Aceh to attend my friend’s wedding! Also has 5 days trip at Aceh – Weh Island – Medan. Probably gonna write about this also later :p

Went to Dufan again on this month hahaha but this time with different group of friends. Drove car for the first time here at Bandung hahaha.

On this month, another first time, joining a singing contest with my friend Gita. Just a little competition that held by my korean class. If my friend didn’t ask me to sing duet with her, I won’t be doing this lol. We got second place! Amixx also performed😉

Closing this month with seeing a falling star. And Aquila🙂

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That’s what happened from April to June! Most of them though, I didn’t put more detail because it will be a diary if I write more details xD It already look like a diary when I re-read this again lol